The Habit Loop Explained | Why You Keep Doing What You Swore You’d Stop

It's a. Name. Oh, let me find out I want to get better. Let me find out how I actually want to get better. Heyday, you'll. Say, yes, new day. It's so new, Yes, Lord, get them scummy man, new day, this sun, new Man. Yes Man, the new day, new day, this sun new. Man. Family forms to you all. Man, Thank you all so much, man for taking the time to tune in and really truly genuinely appreciate it. Man. If I had a million tongues, I couldn't tell it all. Hey man, some days it's just hit different man. Some days it's just hit different, New day, new day. Some days it's just hit different, man. Thank you all so much. Welcome back to the Black Coffee Club, Man Holsted, by yours truly, Junior, the Truth brought to you by the Black Gentleman Grooming Company. We do have a line of all natural handcraft and grooming products specifically with you in mind, so we sure to come check us out www dot the Black gint dot com. Once again, that is www dot the Black gent dot com. Man, we do have a line of all natural handcrafted grooming products u specifically with you and mine, so be sure to come check us out. Man, if you haven't done, so go check us out. It costs you nothing to go check us out. Www Dot The Black Gent dot com. Ladies. We even have a little razzle dazzle for YouTube. Man, So salute to the family. Now know we can't have nothing without having the sisters involved. You feel me, you have a You have an anarchy on your hands, Man, if you don't find a way to include the women folk. But salute to the family. Shout out to everybody that goes over there. Man shows loves to the come to the Black Gent. We really truly genuinely appreciate you, Man, and today's show Man is also brought to you by Simple Truth. Minute Man, You're man the whole entire system. Go over to www Dot Minniemayo dot com, Man and get your one hour book. Go get your planner. They're available both in the print form and digital form. Man. The book is the one our book that will change the way you watch the clock. And of course it's a trustee companion is the Personal Planner Man, So y'all be sure to go the twenty twenty six Personal Planner. Man, it's over there, which includes the Minute Manual, Self Mastery Blueprint. Man self master in three hundred and sixty five as man, we getting to it like lighter fluid too. Salute to everybody. Man, it's taking the time of two Ni and Keya. Allen in the building. What's up with you? For our sniper? What's up with you? Homie? Felix Newonas is in a building. Kevin Dunbar the scholar in a building. K Underscore is in a building. Desmond Cunkin doll my BCU family is in the building. STORMYB Man the sin Say is in the building. What's up with you? Thriving glow with Joe is in the building. Thriving blood. Joe was in the building. What's up with you? Joe? Seven o' fo jo was in the building. We got them Joe's coming in back to back seven o' fo Joe is in the building. What's up with you? Salute the dirt gang bosses in the building. What's up with your family? Salute he dropping in that hashtag thought mastery Yes indeed, man, Yes indeed, man, And I am you know your favorite thought mastery self mastery provocateur, extraordinary uh so, Salute to you all man. I'm man man if I had a million tons, I couldn't tell it all. It's a trouble man Tuesday, King Vonnie eighty six in the building, I see you, homie. Salute to everybody that's taking the time to tune in live. Shout out to the replay gang in full effect mold like I'll be sure. Salute to the replay Gang. Also shout out to everybody catching this content in podcast format. Salute to the podcast family. Melafami LEI, your hashtag, Junior Mafia and my absolute first love when it comes to this content creation. So man, we want to do that, man, I man, listen once again. Man, it's the twentieth day of January in twenty twenty six. Today's January twentieth. Saluta tifty two in the building, I see you tifty two. Today is January twentieth. Do we need to let that breede for a minute, Like do we need to let that bree for a minute? Like it's January twentieth, Like, damn this year, ain't it ain't playing it? Ain't it's man, it's not here to play no games, Like it's not here to play any games. In case you wonder this January twenty year, twenty twenty six, space Age forever. We in the space age year as hell. The Indiana Hoosiers just run the National College Football Championship last night. The Hoosiers shout out to Coach Signati. You feel me the Hoosiers one man Saluta, Coach Signetti. Coach Signetti was my offensive coordinator, quarterbacks coach, and he was the He was the head of recruiting too at the University of Pittsburgh. He actually recruited me. Part of the reason why I actually chose the University of Pittsburgh, Man Salut, the coach signetty. But the Hoosias are the national champions. Man, it's a wild it's a wild game. It's a wild it's wild out here. It's wild out here. So today I wanted to talk about something that quietly controls pretty much everybody's lives. I'll say most people's lives. It quietly controls most people lives and its habits just straight to the point, habits, And it's not if you think about it, the majority of us. Our lives are not controlled by motivation, not control by discipline, not control by willpower. Our lives are controlled by our habits, whether we want to admit it or not. You understand what I'm saying. And the reason why habits feel stronger than all those other things is because habits don't require permission once they're installed. You feel me with your habits. Once you install your habits, they don't require permission. Think about the things that you habitually do, good or bad. Some of us we have some of us have good habits. If anything like me, you have bad habits. I have some. I'm passing some pretty awful habits. If I'm being honest, I have some good habits as well. But once the habits are installed, like they don't ask for permission period. So today's episode, of course, it's called the Habit Look one on one. For those of y'all who are who are who like to read, you know what I'm saying. Some people just click. But for those of us who like to read, you see that it's the Habit Look one on one. And this is not about shame and bad habits. MJ's total health and wellness in the building. What's up with you, homie? This is not about shame and bad habits. And this is not about hype or hacks either. You understand what I'm saying. This is about understanding how habits actually work, so that we can stop fighting ourselves and start redesigning our systems. Twenty twenty six is the year of the system. This is all about our systems. Old school. Instantly, I seen in the building. What's up with jammy? This is all about our systems. Let's get one. So I'm hustled harder than the moment. I'm a feast on these streets. Got a revolver, I told for these niggas trying to take me off the block where our points up daily sit Bailey's out the bottle of smoke. Well, let me ask all a real question, man, before we get started. Man, who got it like us? Man? Who who got it? Like us? Man? Shout out to the most intentional I'm a dare to say, consistent morning circle on the planet. Man, salute to you all. Like we really in here talking self mastery every day, and we're really in here trying to work to get better every single day. You feel me day in and day out. No celebrity gossip, no distractions, no nothing like We're coming in here and really truly trying to bite down the focus on ourselves. And I can't speak for you, but I'm actually I'm actually I'm actually getting better, Like I'm actually getting better, and I can't really ask for much more. Man, Thank you all so much for the for the support. Thank you all so much for coming through man and showing up day in and day out. Man, And I love y'all like play cousins. You feel me in a real way. But so let's get into it man, like we really want to get into man. Let's break this down clean. Let's do this. Let's let's work clean today. Let's work clean today, King Fonnie, we gonna work clean. So I want to break this down clean, and I want y'all, y'all gonna walk away from this, and y'all gonna say, damn Junior clean like he clean, We're gonna work clean. So habits, every habit, whether it's a good habit or it's a bad habit, runs on the same basic structure, like there is a basic structure to your habits. And I know we never ever sat down and thought about it. We never even thought about our habits, Like you know, most of us aren't. We live life on auto pilots so tough, we don't even we don't even acknowledge our habits. But every habit runs on the same basic structure. Once again, this is a month of January, and this is intentional awareness, and there is there's no intentional awareness with regard to self mastery without acknowledging and taking a look at our habits, because our habits control our lives. So every habit, good or bad, runs on the same basic structure. There's a Q, there's a routine, and then there's a reward, Q routine reward. You can write that down if you want to, Q routine reward every habit. That's it. There's no mystery, no mystery to it. You understand what I'm saying. When we talk about psychology, Like in the field of psychology, habits are actions triggered automatically by queues in a given context without much conscious thought. You understand what I'm saying. So in psychology like that, when we're dealing with psychology, the definition of habits or the description and definition of habits all in one. Habits are actions trigger automatically by q's in a given context. In a given context, And when I say QS, that's see you e S. Not on Mega sci Fi, I'm talking see you E S QS. So habits are actions triggered automatically by q's in a given context, without much conscious thought. And that's why you don't decide to check your phone sometimes, you feel me. You don't decide to check your phone. You just do it. You just do it. You just pick it up and you just do it. Yeah, yeah, you just do it. Phelix knew as Junior said dopamine hits. A lot of habits are tied to dopamine hits, but they're not one and the same. You feel me a lot of times. The the dopamine hits are the reward. Remember, a habit is a Q routine and reward. I told y'all we was going to school. Q routine reward and so the dupe meine hits fall under the reward category from time to time. But you don't decide to check your phone. Sometimes you just do it. So let me. So the Q, the Q c u E, not qu E. The Q is the trigger you feel me. So a Q is the trigger whatever triggers you, that's the Q. The routine, that's the actual behavior itself. So whatever the routine is with regard to a specific habit, that's the that's the behavior itself, and then the reward is what your brain actually gets. Felix, Like you said, dopamine hits. So the reward is what your brain actually gets. And that's all a habit is. Habit broken down into three parts, a Q which is the trigger, the routine which is the actual behavior, and then the reward is what your brain gets. And once this loop is wired in, once it's like really wired into your Once it's wired in and it's wired into your into your into your brain, you feel me, it's wired into your life. The Q alone can fire the behavior even when the motivation is low. Even when the motivation is absent, the QUE alone will fire the behavior. Habits don't run because you want them to. The habits. The habits don't run because you want them to. They run because they've been repeated. You understand. They're wired in. They're wired in. So you know, sometimes when you leave work and you get in a car and the first thing you do is you far you far up. You feel me. It might be a cigarette, might be a cigar, might be a joint, hell, might be a blunt. You feel me. That's how you wired You have a tough conversation or difficult conversation. Oh, man, I need a drink. Long day work, man, I need a beer, sit down and watch to sit down and watch college football. Man, I need a brew. I'm pouring me a drink. You feel me? Hell the Blues come on, b B king in the blues zz hell down home blue, down home blue. Ah. She wanted to hear. Yeah, man, I need me a whiskey. I need me a whiskey. Habits don't run because you want them to. They run because they've been repeated. I'm thinking that, like really truly, hopefully, I really want you to get this, like don't if you here get this. Your habit is broken down into three parts. Is there's a queue, there's a routine, and then there's a reward. All right, So let's let's we're gonna go deeper. You feel me, We're gonna we're gonna we're gonna go deeper. Let's let's get in there deeper real quick. Let's get in there deeper. So when we talk about the queue two or a KA the trigger, So the queue is what starts the whole thing with regard to a habit, and this queue is usually tied to time lowka your emotional state people, or the action that comes right before the actual qu You understand what I'm saying. You know, they remember they used to have sex and then smoke a cigarette. You feel me? Why they're sitting there painting and fire up a cigarette. Maybe y'all just ain't old like me. You understand what I'm saying, y'all ain't old like me. Yeah, But ques or the trigger is what starts the whole thing, once again, is tied to a time location. Emotional state is a big one. People is another big one. Or the action that came right before an example might be bored them at night, k Underscore. It might be stressed after work. It might be sitting on the couch felix, or it might be opening phone just once, like you look at your phone just once. Most people don't see the Q. That's the that's the that's the the This is where it gets tricky. Most people don't see the queue. They only see the behavior. You feel me, they only see the behavior. You're going to the to the toilet and you're finna go sit down for a while. What's your cue? I mean, what's your h that's the que? What's the behavior You're gonna grab your phone. You feel me, you're gonna grab the phone because that's the behavior. The behavior is to sit on the toilet and scroll. You understand what I'm saying. K On the Score said, you just made me pick up my phone, not the habit. Number two is the routine. The routine AKA is the behavior. AKA is the behavior. The routine is the habit itself, scrolling, snack, avoiding, overworking, drinking, smoking, zoning out. This part gets all the blame, but it's not the whole story. So like the actual routine itself or AKA, the behavior gets the whole blame with regard to the habit, but it's not the whole story. That's just part of it. Because I told you it's three parts to it, three parts to it. But the routine is the actual habit slash behavior itself, scrolling, snacking, avoiding, overworking, drinking, smoking, bugging, whatever, zoning out. You understand what I'm saying. Some of us, you know, some of us have. If y'all really want to tell the truth, some of us have. Sex is a has been used as a habit. You feel me, start feeling a certain way, and then you, like Holly Bury your monster's ball, make me feel good. Make me feel good. Yeah mm hmm. Yeah, you be stressed out and you gotta get you one off if we're having a real conversation. You feel me, Felix new that said this phone. Man, it's like crap, you feel me, and you just gotta go to it. Poolky, I just gotta go to it. I just gotta go to it. And just be calling me, man, it just be calling me. The third part is the reward, and this is what the brain gets, aka what the brain gets the reward. This is the part that people ignore. The reward is what your brain gets. Your brain gets something from your habits. You feel me. Your brain gets something from your habits, else you wouldn't be doing it. Ohiston, got real scholastic in here today, y'all. Like it's then, like I'm nerding out over this, Like I am a self mastery nerd. Like I'm nerding out over this. You feel me. I'm over here tweaking, and I see people dropping out because they ain't tweaking like me. I'm tweaking habits. Like we gonna literally break down and describe habits today. What man, my God in heaven, your brain gets something from your habits. There's a reward for your habits. It might be relief. It might be pleasure. It might be stimulation. It might be a dopamine hit. It might be comfort. It might be an escape, thriving glow with Joe. Don't be laughing at me, Joe. I get worse. But your brain gets something and your brain this is where it gets tricky, Joe. This is where it gets tricky, Joe. Your brain doesn't care if the habit is healthy or destructive, as long as it gets what is getting. As long as it's getting what it is getting, it don't care. Honey, badger, don't care. Your brain don't care. As long as it's getting what it's getting, it don't care. It could beat man, you think, man, Come on, man, the mind of a of a let's let's let's use a We call them drug addicts. I really want to say, dope fiend. You think the brain of adulte fiend cared that this motherfucker's on dope. As long as the brain is getting what the brain is seeking. Long as it's getting what it's getting, it doesn't care if the habit is healthy or destructive. If it gets a reward, it will repeat it. If it gets the reward, it will repeat. I think a couple of dope things ran out the back. The numbers look like they dropping, but we dropping some game on the ground for the hungry hounds. Yeah. Your brain, that's the That's the thing with regard to the reward. The brain is loyal to relief, not long term goals. You feel me. Your brain is loyal to relief. Whatever gets your mind relief, that is what your mind and your brain that's where the loyalty goes in. Your brain is loyal to relief, not your goals. Salute to the message to one five man, what's up with you all me? Salute man, gratitude to you man, Thank you, thank you. King Vonnie said, pick up this good game or get the hell on. Hey, he broke, King Vonnie Bruh, and I apologize to y'all man that I'm still upstairs in the office and not in the studio. I would and did some spackling yesterday. We almost done. I'm gonna share some updates over on the You gotta go over to the Simple Truth Network though, to get the pictures and the updates. Salute the shagri Ady five. What's up with you baby? Hey, listen to me. Your brain is loyal to relief, not your goals. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Habit loops are powerful, man, and they're dangerous. They're powerful and they're dangerous. Yeah, habit loops. They exist for a reason. They're not inherently evil. You feel me? Two two five bucks and talk? What's up with you? Holled me? Salute to you. They're not inherently evil, you feel me. It's like everything else in life, man, there's pros and there's cons to this shit. Right, there's pros and there's cons. There's pros and cons to habits. Man, I want y'all, this is one of the ones I want you to go back and listen to on my soul, like I want you to go back and listen to this one. You feel me. Those of y'all who come in lay, I employ you to when this is over, stick around. But when it's over, man, go back and listen to this one. You feel me, man, But listen to me. Habit loose exists for a reason, and they're not evil, you know what I mean. They're not necessarily inherently evil. So here's some pros and cons. So for the pros, right, they save energy and attention. Right energy efficiency. If you will, they increase consistency nothing, man. One of the best things in life is a consistent person. In my opinion, right, wrong, indifferent. I love a motherfucker that's consistent. You could be an asshole through and through it through, But if you consistent, I can't do nothing but respect it. You know I'm stupid. You could be a you could be a you could be a creep. But as long as you, long as you consistent with it, I can't do nothing but respect it. I can't do nothing but respect it and check it. You could be a pompous jackass. If you consistent, I can't do nothing but respect it. But in consistency survival of motivation, of motivation dips up and down. The peaks and valleys of life allow compound, allowing compound progress, allowing compound progress, and they can give structure for change. And that's why habits like brushing your teeth or locking the door actually work. But here's the problem. Here's the problem. Habits become rigid. Also, bad habits wire in the same way, So bad habits and good habits are wired in the same way. Automatic behavior reduces conscious control. Right you feel me, And if you think about that, think about it out how negativity is and can be for you for you to do things unconsciously. Also think about people who are around you and how unnerved you are when people do things unconsciously. That's one of mine. That's actually one of my pet pees I don't I have a very strong pet peece for people who don't have situational awareness, or who are not aware of things around them, or who do not have consideration for other folks. You feel me, But automatic behavior reduces your conscious control. Also, certain environments trap you. Certain environments will trap you well constricted. What's up with you? All needs tolute to you. And then also, habits can take a long time to rewire. So y'all not gonna want to hear this, but this is the truth. You need to hear it, so I'm gonna give it to you. The same system that build your discipline will also build your distractions, you feel me. The same exact system that builds your discipline is the same exact system that builds your distractions. And once a habit is automatic, your intentions, your intentions alone, don't stop it. You feel me, Think about how hard it is to break a habit. All it's a breaking a habit is a motherfucker. Excuse my French. Oh it's hard to break a habit. Yeah. Yeah. So keeping this spirit with the January of twenty twenty five being the being the month of intentional awareness with regard to the self mastery blueprint, we gotta get in here, man, we gotta get in here. And this is where the self mastery starts. This is where it starts with not with force, but with clarity. With clarity, you gotta identify your habit loops. You gotta map your habit loops, man. And when you identify your habits, right, I would encourage you all, especially those of y'all who actually have the planner. You can use the planner in your note section and you can you can write down your habit. Don't keep it vague. It might be your habit might be I don't know, scrolling doom, scrolling while on the toilet in the morning, and you have to and then you doing. If you that's your habit, you gotta write that habit down. But then you gotta identify the que the routine and the reward and just like everything else, track it for a while track it for a couple of days. Your patterns are not gonna lie. You feel me, But you gotta identify your habit loops. For me, I have a habit that every sporting event, I want wings like I want to eat wings and drink beer like Luda Chicken and birr. You feel me. I gotta track that. Yeah, and then step two is the experiment with the real reward. Most bad habits are clumsy attempts to meet real needs. Does that make sense? Most of your bad habits are clumsy attempts to meet real needs. You feel me, so your mind might you might they need stress relief. You feel me so your way that you get to this stress relief might be smoking a blunt. You feel me instead of talking and actively processing what's going on, processing a source of stress. You feel me. But most bad habits are clumsy attempts to meet real needs. That's a bar. That's a bar, thrive and glow with Joe. That's something I want you to do something with that, Joe. I want you to take that one, and I want you to use that one for a piece of content on your channel. Joe, that's a bar. Listen to me, listen to me trying to influence, thrive and glow with Joe Joe. I just say that most bad habits are clumsy attempts to meet real needs. Think about that, you feel me, Think about that, Think about that, Think about and then think about how we eat, think about how we snack, think about how we scrawl, think about things that we do mindlessly. Most bad habits are clumsy attempts to meet real needs. So it's a needs, some needs like rest needs, like stimulation needs, like connection needs like relief. You feel me, so you might need to You might have a need, and you feel the need to be connected with people, and you get your plunk ass on social media instead of picking up the phone and calling one of your loved ones. You feel me. Most bad habits are clumsy attempts at real needs. So like, I have people all the time in and I'm about to start cussing people out. That's what I'm about to start doing. Because people say stuff to me like I got aunts and uncles and cousins and shit, like they might want to hear from me, and they just go and look and see what's going on on my Facebook page. You feel me instead of calling me, like, don't go look and see what's going on with me on Facebook? A heard from Junior in a while, and go look at my Facebook. Fuck that call me? Text me you feel me? Like. Most bad habits are clumsy attempts to meet real needs. Yeah, once again, those needs could be like rest, stimulation, connection, relief. You feel me. So let's experiment with real rewards. So when we have these feels for these needs, test alternatives, Test alternative things. So if you need stimulation instead of instead of I don't know shit, getting on social media, go take a brisk walk. Go take a brisk walk in nature. I swear to do it for you. I swear to do it for you. And I'm talking to myself. I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to myself. You feel me, But test alternatives and see what actually satisfies the urge. See what actually satisfies the urge that we have for these real needs. All right, all right, all right, all right, we gotta get ready to get out of here. Man. So, and this is the part that most people get wrong. You don't break habits by trying harder. You do not break habits by trying harder. We think in life that everything is fixed when we just try harder. You don't break habits by trying harder. You break habits by interrupting the loop on purpose. You feel me. I did a post yesterday and it was a short, and it was a short based on the It was a clip from a show that we did last week, and what I was saying was that when when the right behavior becomes the e behavior, then consistency follows. This is the same thing. You break habits by interrupting the loop on purpose. You feel me. You keep the queue and you keep the reward, but you swap out the routines. You feel me. And that's what we just said. So you get the queue that you need some stimulation because you've been sitting at the computer and instead of looking at picking up your phone and getting on social media, put your shoes on and go outside and do a briskwalk. It's an example, but you swap out the routine. So an example. Another example, you got the same stress, same time, same need for relief, just a different action. You feel me at work, same stress, same time, same need for relief. Don't go to your car and smoke a black and mouth you feel me, go walk around the building, Go walk over to the Starbucks across the street and talk to a couple of people. You feel me. Number two and once again, Number one was keep the cue and the reward, swap out the routine. Number two is changed the environment. Habits are context dependent. They are context dependent, meaning they need the same situation they need They are attached specifically to the situation. Habits are context dependent. Remove triggers, hide temptations, ad friction, place prompts for new routines. Design beats discipline. You understand what I'm saying, and that goes back to the need for systems. Your design is gonna beat your discipline every trip. Remove triggers, hide temptations, ad frictions, make the When I say ad friction, I mean make things more difficult. Make the negative habits it's more difficult. And then place prompts for new routines. Place prompts for new routines. Thrive and go with Joe said gym therapy. Yeah. Number three is use repetition, accountability and self compassion. Repetition, accountability and self compassion. I promise I gotta go rewiring. It's gonna take time, It's gonna take months, maybe even years, not days. Expect that you're gonna slip up, you feel me. Learn from the times that you slip up, and don't shame yourself self. Compassion keeps you in the game long enough to change, you, feel me. Salut to my brother Supreme beat box and call box boxing talk Now, what's up with your family? Is you a cop? J Red? You thought I was gonna give it to you because you my brother? Is you a cop? Jay Red? Jay Red? You ain't no cop? Is you a cop? You ain't no cop? Jy Red? Don't shame yourself self. Compassion keeps you in the game long enough to change you dust yourself fough and try again. Ain't that what she said? If at first shit, don't succeed this yourself foughing, try again? Looking at it all right, man, I gotta get out of here. But family, here's the truth. This is the truth. This is the show. Enough stomp down, Hallelujah Gospel. You feel me. Your habits are not a character flaw. They're your system. And once you understand the loop, the queue, the routine, the reward, you stop fighting yourself and start leading yourself. Start leading yourself, you feel me, Start leading yourself self mastery isn't isn't about willpower. It's about awareness, design and repetition. Man, it's here's the Black Coffee Club. Man, we family, you feel me. We don't shame habits. We study them. And once you see the loop, you can change your life. Man, once you see the loop, you can change your habits. And you change your habits, you change your life. She'd say it that way. Salute to you all, man, Thank you all so much for taking the time to tune in. Man, really truly genuinely appreciate you all. Man, I had a blast. I had a blast with this one. You feel me. I had a blast with this one. Man, I had a blast. If you came in late, man, go catch the replay. Hit the light button. If you haven't done so, Man, y'all be sure to come over to you can catch me juniortruth dot com. Come over and join the Simple Truth Network. If you haven't done so, we can keep the conversation going on over on the Simple Truth Network. Man, salute to you all. This is Junior truth sanding off. Man. Give you your daily reminder to view your life like a pair of dice. Until your life it's like a pair of Iceman. I'm a hardborn player made if you don't know anything else about me. At the end of the day, I gotta keep pushing baby. We offer the best grooming buds for you. For you, the Sung Natural and Handcraft too. We want to help the swag swag us dot class and Luxury luxury. Man, You've got products cells made for you. The top quality gets to get us. Start with the black dot. Black cat tumping me and compete you swag U b stop Class and Luxury and Luxury. Flack gentlemen, Blacky Company. If you swag a slag, got out class and Luxury and Luxury. Located at www dot the black gent dot com one. So I hustled harder than the most. I'm a feast on these streets. Got a revolver I told for these niggas trying to take me off the block where I poised upda